There’s a girl you’ve had your eye on for a while. You think she’s cute and you think she’s flirting with you. You’re interested, but you’re not sure if she’s a lesbian or not. How can you tell if she’s a lesbian?
People don’t usually wear a label on their foreheads declaring them gay, straight, bisexual or otherwise. Asking someone you just met if she is lesbian or bisexual is kind of awkward and they might be taken aback.
Remember that there are no hard and fast rules and certainly no accurate online lesbian tests to determine if a person is Lesbian or not. The best, simplest and not to mention foolproof way to find out if she is gay or potentially interested is basically to ask her.
Another better approach is to try and find out in more subtle ways.
• Do not assume that someone is gay/les/bi because they support gay rights. A lot of straight people are “allies” of the gay rights movement.
Some people claim to have “gaydar” the ability to tell if someone is gay or not. Sometimes gaydar can be about looking for clues in the person’s behavior or dress that indicates she is a lesbian.
We all know the stereotypical image of a lesbian: A butch in baggy jeans and a trucker cap wearing no make-up and a stern scowl. But how true is this?
The ‘Lesbian Chic’ look will allow one to combine both looks into a classy, metrosexual style
Rainbow inspired accessories like anklets, bracelets, earrings, rings or even rainbow bumper stickers could be reliable clues that she is a lesbian. Yet, it is also likely that she is just an advocate of gay rights. Choice of lesbian apparel is also quite similar to straight females. But remember that lesbians don’t wear these clothes like straight girls do. Brands like Androgyny, Original Tomboy, Veer NYC, Tomboy Tailors and Wildfang are also undoubtedly helpful in spotting lezzies. A straight girl can wear a baseball cap and still be as straight and “homophobic” as Jessica Simpson. But if she wears it snap back or sideways, then she maybe a lesbian.
Is there such a thing as lesbian fashion or do lesbians have a particular style? We think so yes, beyond the jokes about lesbian clothes and sensible shoes, jeans and jumpers, it is a style that has been over looked by the high street.
We know that people do not usually wear clothes with tags showing their sexual preferences. Although gays in general are known to have a flamboyant and proud fashion sense. Still, some are naturally not this showy. Nevertheless, there are still dead giveaway tomboy styles that may convince you she’s gay.
“Lesbians, especially bisexuals and femmes, can also dress like hot-jaw-dropping-chicks. Do not be easily deceived! Spot ‘em cautiously!
There are some haircuts that are too lesbo to be mistaken.
•straight women will probably not wear a faux hawk or a Mohawk. So if you see this cut, instincts will tell you that she is definitely a lesbian.
•short hair is suspicious, but not at all times gay, so be careful in judging this type.
•A girl with a barber’s cut or a military cut with too much gel in it is typically 80% lesbian, save those enlisted in the army.
•Bieber-ish and messy bob cuts coupled with the Nirvana smiley shirt, hoodie, Vans, DC and penny boards are also good indicators of “I am a lesbian so deal with it”
•asymmetrical cuts and shaved heads are also positive lezzie signs. Well, possible exceptions are: she just broke up with her boyfriend, she is in the middle of a life crisis, she is into pills, drugs. Otherwise, she might be gay. so be careful with that assumption.
-Not all attracted to women have any of these hairstyles but more often than not, those who do are Lesbos!
Sometimes people will give you clues in their conversations.
Of course, talking to someone and finding out more about them is really the best way to tell if someone is a lesbian or not. So if there is someone you’re interested in, and If you have the guts to ask her, If the issue is truly putting pressure on you and you feel like you need to know, Here is how you should ask her. Consider these steps:
• Find a quiet, private setting to discuss the topic. You don’t want to embarrass her or you by asking in front of other people.
• Try to be open and compassionate, so that she can feel comfortable being honest with you. Speak gently and in a calm tone, don’t frown at her, and don’t make disapproving remarks.
• Don’t press the issue. If she says “no,” leave it alone. She might not be ready to come out yet, or she might not be a lesbian – either way, though, don’t prod.
• Let it go when the conversation is over. Don’t keep harping on what was said, and try not to let the discussion change your friendship. Once you’ve finished your talk, resume business as usual.
• Remember that sexual orientation is about self-identity. If she tells you her sexual orientation, do not doubt or question her, but respect how she would like to be identified.
• Do not use words such as “queer” “fag” “dyke” and “butch” unless you are absolutely sure that she is not offended by such words. Never use them in a derogatory way. If you come off as a bigot or prejudiced towards LGBT people, there is very small chance of her coming out to you.
Just remember these are just assumptions, intuitions or clues. It is very possible for someone to break all these things and still be gay.
If you are in doubt, follow your instincts. Ask yourself. WHAT DOES YOUR GUT TELL YOU? If your gut tells you she’s a Lesbian, then she probably is.
Do not instantly assume that she is a lesbian. Even if she is, never assume that she is attracted to you. Being a lesbian and being attracted are two different things!